Blog

The Difference Family Constellations makes in Couples Therapy. RCH

‘A Stitch in time saves nine’. RCH Couples therapy.  

Most people assume that when we find the right partner that love will sustain the relationship through the ups and downs of life. However we often form a marriage or relationship while young and inexperienced before we really know who we are.

We cannot foresee how we will grow and develop and how we will feel twenty or more years later. We also cannot know the consequences of our choices or the kinds of events that we will have to face. How can we?

Our culture is such that we often don’t look for help in our relationship until it has reached critical or chronic proportions even though there are clear signals along the way that things are not going well. We may not want to spend the money or time to sort it out for many reasons and turn a blind eye until it is beyond repair.

But how much does a divorce cost in money, time, chaos and hurt as the life of a couple and family disintegrate?

Couples therapy may take place through many models. Most involve couples sessions only and focus primarily on communication and expressing feelings as well as strategies for living more harmoniously together. In short a discussion of problems, needs, feelings and expectations and how the couple may improve their relationship.

In my experience of over seventeen years with couples talk therapy alone does not resolve the deeper-seated issues that couples face. Couples issues involve communication, sex, infidelity, finance, trust, previous partners, children and extended family. The problem is even though these areas may be perceived as issues, they are often symptomatic of deeper dysfunctions.

If the crux of such issues were simply communication, behaviour and misunderstandings these may be resolved through a counselling process successfully. And many are. However if deep-seated issues remain after counselling, I have found continuing talk therapy to be unhelpful. Deeper issues need to be resolved at the level they arise. The roots of these often reside in blind spots in the mind and are often unconscious or part of their family systems.

Here is an example. A couple were concerned about the lack of trust that a man had in his wife. In discussion it was disclosed that his mother had been unfaithful to his father even though their marriage had remained intact. He was very aware of his father’s pain. In looking at the history of his partner, her father had left the family for another woman. It was clear that mistrust and the pain of infidelity had been a real experience for both of their family systems. Talk or cognitive therapy is unlikely to go deep enough to resolve such deep emotional drivers so they can start to build more trust between them. A Family Constellation was able to help each of the couple resolve their own family of origin issues so they could look back at each other with new eyes and start the process of a new start to their relationship.

Another couple was struggling with the level of anger the wife had for her partner. She had experienced significant abuse by her father. In looking at her family of origin through a Family Constellation she was able to acknowledge, express and resolve the rage she felt for what had happened and then was able to look at her husband in a different way. She immediately felt a pang of guilt for blaming him for her rage as she realised it had little to do with him and their life together. The anger she had directed at him had been misplaced. If we had stayed in a traditional talk therapy or cognitive approach there may well have been some awareness raised for the couple, but this is unlikely to have changed the instinctive reactive pattern that they were locked into.

I am a psychotherapist and Family Constellations facilitator who is the founder of Rapid Core Healing (RCH) couples-therapy and Emotional Mind Integration (EMI). These are new and effective ways of working with couples that allows each of the couple to resolve their family of origin issues and also the relationship itself for deeper effective solutions.  I am the founder of EMI and RCH. These modalities have been formulated through my work with couples and families. The RCH couple approach requires only one to a few groups of four sessions for most couples rather months or years of traditional therapies making it cost and time efficient.

Once family of origin projections are no longer playing out between the couple it is possible to focus on each of their emotional mind states, connection and communication. I find that once these deeper invisible dynamics are resolved other factors fall into place relatively easily. The Family Constellation process operated on many levels simultaneously. The conscious, unconscious, family system, body senses and according to its founder Bert Hellinger the personal and family soul.

RCH couple therapy is a relatively quick process where deep-seated generational patterns along with personal ones of expectations, roles, communication and boundaries may be resolved from one to several series of the four-sessions program. This may take place in workshops or private or skype sessions,

I visualise a time where couples seek help at many stages of their relationship knowing it to be a cost effective and valuable way of keeping their relationship alive. Not only to save a relationship when it is in crisis, but also to sustain and enrich it, or alternatively to enable the best separation they can have so that they can move forward in a good way. Such a philosophy and program would provide mature and healthy role models for children to witness with the message that its Ok to ask for help at times because ‘A stitch in time saves nine’.

Personal help
Yildiz holds couples, individual and workshop sessions . You may read about her RCH Couples approach in her latest book Rapid Core Healing Pathways to Growth and Emotional Healing  Details .

Professional Training 

The Next EMI Training is taking place  on 11 September 2017 Special Early Bird price in operation-Be quick.

Details of RCH Training, Family Constellations training and EMI training Book in NOW contact  yildiz@yildizsethi.com

Yildiz is a Brisbane psychotherapist, clinical hypnotherapist, family constellations facilitator and trainer. She is the founder of Rapid Core Healing and Emotional Mind Integration and an Author.

Organisations involved in training or growth interested in EMI courses or applications may contact me on. 0412 172 300 www.rapidcorehealing.com RCH couple therapy

Yildiz is the founder of two psychotherapies, a clinical hypnotherapist, Family Constellations facilitator and educator/trainer and author of three books Details. Yildiz lives and runs a private practice in Brisbane, Australia, travelling nationally and globally to train clinicians and run workshops for the general public.

Contact yildiz@yildizsethi.com +61 412 172 300

Here is who I am www.yildizsethi.com and this is how you may engage in what I have to offer www.rapidcorehealing.com.

Here is who I am www.yildizsethi.com and this is how you may engage in what I have to offer www.rapidcorehealing.com.

 

 

Make Peace with Yourself through Family Constellations

At this time in our history most of us are conditioned into believing we are self sufficient and autonomous. This is what modern men and women believe is empowering.

What has become apparent is that this is not totally true.

The study of epigentics is showing that we carry much more from our ancestors than we had previously assumed.

Epigentics is showing that trauma, disturbed emotions and patterns are inextricably linked or embedded in the DNA we receive at birth. This means that a person who comes from a particular culture will receive the essence of what has gone before them. Of course this includes love and belonging and also the shocks their family system has experienced particularly those that could not be processed at that time. These may include societal or family trauma, genocide, the effects of war and famine as well as unresolved relational pain. These feelings and shocks appear to reside largely in our blind spots. In our unconscious mind or in what I have come to think of as our generational mind.

While it is true that you are a unique individual, you are also highly relational.

Originally we were born into tribes and formed strong bonds of loyalty to each other. This served a purpose. It served the survival of the tribe and the individuals within it. Being disconnected or excluded from the group would often result in death.

My work with individuals shows repeatedly that such tribal or relational connections are much more important that most people realise. At our core our tribal identity is still pivotal to our health and wellbeing. We are born into families with an intense deep web of loyalties and connections with others. We are deeply linked to all that has gone before us and to people we have never met.

This is how we may be born into a sense of guilt, shame, sadness, anger or sabotage patterns that make no logical sense to the biography of our individual lives. And yet they continue to play out until they are resolved.

Many of us believe that awareness is the answer. I have found that being aware is only one step and does not provide a more fulfilling solution. Awareness is a knowing that is conscious. It does not in itself have the power to resolve the underlying dynamics that operate within us. This involves unconscious, loyalties and conflicts and such elements as emotions, visions and messages that are part of our family system. In many cases attempting to think through such deeply felt issues does not resolve them, as they often require experiential processing. This takes place at deeper levels of the psyche and includes the body, heart and also generational consciousness in order to be resolved and released.

I often have clients who have done much personal development who are frustrated that they have not been able to free themselves from the patterns that bind them from being able to develop and enjoy their life with more freedom. Deeply help patterns appear to be stubborn to resolution by conventional counselling or coaching.

I have been working with Family Constellations since 2005 in holding monthly workshops and private sessions.

Prior to that I was a counsellor psychotherapist and unaware of the effects of the family system on myself and those close to me. I had no idea of the patterns that were unconsciously running in me, and the effects they were having on my wellbeing and relationships. The discovery through Family Constellations was groundbreaking in that it gave me an avenue to come to peace with myself on many levels. From here I was able to more consciously navigate my life. This became a significant crossroad in my life resulting in a radical change in the way I worked with clients. I embraced Family Constellations as a more authentic way of helping others make deep and effective changes in themselves and their lives.

I found that change had to start with me first. I had to go through my own processing within my system to allow space for an arrival to a better place. Only then could this flow out to those around me. Previously my unconscious patterns even with good intentions, were running the show. I was not fully capable of providing a way forward for others and their family systems when I was coming from a place of entanglement and confusion myself.

I was not in the right place to hold a space for the healthy unfolding and resolution in others until I had experienced my own.

It is exciting to be working with Family Constellations at a time when neural science and epigentics are becoming mainstream and educating the public in how genetic memory travels through generations and how the brain is capable of rewiring itself. Rewiring new neural pathways for better feeling, mindset, health and wellbeing.

I look forward to the time when doctors, alternative and traditional health workers refer patients to Family Constellations practitioners as part of a wholistic health practice in knowing that healthily connected individuals are more likely to respond favourably to healing methodologies when they are at peace with themselves and their bloodlines.

Ends Copyright Yildiz Sethi

Yildiz holds Family Constellation workshops in Brisbane, Melbourne and Sydney and is available for private sessions and training. www.familyconstellations.com.au.

She is the director of family Constellations P/L

Yildiz is an Australian psychotherapist, clinical hypnotherapist, family constellations facilitator and trainer. She is the innovator of Rapid Core Healing and Emotional Mind Integration and Author. Her latest book is Rapid Core Healing Pathways to Growth and Emotional Healing. www.rapidcorehealingbook.com

Organisations involved in training or growth interested in training courses of Family Constellations, Rapid Core healing or Emotional Mind Integration courses or applications may contact her on +61412 172 300 yildiz@yildizsethi.com or see www.rapidcorehealing.com

Yildiz is available for professional development in mental health, trauma and training organisations.

Here is who I am www.yildizsethi.com and this is how you may engage in what I have to offer www.rapidcorehealing.com

Family Constellations Training Evolution – copyright Yildiz Sethi

Family Constellations is a unique way of resolving issues of relationships, prosperity, worthiness and wellness. This occurs on many levels of mind, body and soul in a brief, experiential and solution-focused process in groups or private sessions.

There is no doubt the art and practice of the Family Constellation process looks easy, particularly with a highly skilled practitioner. This is why it was thought (by the founder Bert Hellinger) in the 1990’s that it could be ‘taught’ through osmosis by simply turning up to workshops. Since then he has revised this and runs a Constellation training institute

The former trend produced many people who claimed to be Family Constellation practitioners.

The problem with this was that a small amount of knowledge of such a deep psychotherapeutic process can be dangerous in unskilled hands. It is relatively easy to open up a constellation field, but requires great skill and presence to facilitate a pathway to a healing impulse.

Since around 2004 there was a shift in this trend when wise practitioners began to offer structured, experiential training as a duty of care to the public in providing safe and competent Family Constellations practitioners. The time of claiming training through public workshops was over.

Since then more structured Family Constellations training has become increasingly standard practice.

I know that competent facilitators have Family Constellations theory and practice etched very deeply into their being. It is from this place they hold a space for a constellation to open open-up and evolve. This level of proficiency requires good training, experience and professional and personal development.

I was extremely grateful and fortunate to have received high quality initial Family Constellations training with Svagito Leibermeister. This provided a nourishing and structured base of personal and professional development from which to grow. Since then I have done many valuable trainings all over the world including the Hellinger institute.

From this I know that the key to good quality Family Constellation training is the knowledge that personal development is just as important as professional development. This means that training is not simply academic but also experiential, involving the heart.

This is important, as resolving personal issues and being comfortable with our own family of origin is a prerequisite to helping others with theirs as a facilitator. This enables more authenticity and deeper, more sensitive facilitation.

As a Family Constellation facilitator, trainer and supervisor I offer comprehensive and structured training.

I am aware that my reputation as a Family Constellation trainer depends on the proficiency of my trainees with their clients. The value of training is measured in the quality and depth of the content and its delivery as well as the experience of the Constellations process and the maturity, experience and proficiency of the trainer.

I envision a time when the training of the helping professions medical, mental health and personal development include emotional intelligence and inner growth alongside academic ability in forming well-balanced practitioners for the benefit of all.

I visualise a time when the philosophy of Family Constellations is well known

and an integral part of the way we think, view and interact with each other making the world a better place.

Ends copyright Yildiz Sethi

Yildiz is the director of Family Constellations P/L. She is a family constellations facilitator and trainer and the innovator of Rapid Core Healing and Emotional Mind Integration and an Author.

Her next Family Constellation training starts 3 January 2017.

Details http://www.familyconstellations.com.au

Her latest book is Rapid Core Healing Pathways to Growth and Emotional Healing. (2016) www.rapidcorehealing.com To see her books www.yildizsethi.com

Yildiz is available for professional development in mental health, trauma and training organisations

Organisations involved in training or growth interested in training courses of Family Constellations, Rapid Core healing or Emotional Mind Integration courses or applications may contact her on yildiz@yildizsethi.com +61412172300.

Here is who I am www.yildizsethi.com and this is how you may engage in what I have to offer www.rapidcorehealing.com.

Relationships matter for Healthy Self Esteem

 

Relationships matter because we are social beings. We are born into families, culture and society and we thrive on human connection..

And yet we are individuals. We live a combination of both the personal and social aspects of ourselves simultaneously.

Our entry into the world is our first experience of others and provides an initial impression of who we are through their eyes. Through this we form an image or feeling of who we are and this forms a deep psychological imprint from which self worth arises.

Children are egocentric in nature, in the way they think the world revolves around them. This means they easily assume the way people respond, behave or treat them is because of them. They assume they are the sole cause of responses in others.

If our parents are delighted to have us in their lives, we interpret this as being loved. We feel valued.

If our parents are going through difficult times or are distant, cool, sad or angry we take this on board too. We interpret this as them not being happy with us and we don’t feel valued. This may lead to seeking approval throughout life of partners, friends and colleagues.

The problem is if these early bonds are not formed well we carry them into adulthood.  We take this evaluation of ourselves into the world or feel responsible for the feelings of others. Feel guilty, sad or angry for no apparent reason. In my experience this is the basis of most self-esteem issues.

Self esteem is the core foundation for worthiness. Once we know this it is easy to see how our sense of worthiness affects our choices in relationships, career, success and wellbeing.

This is important for children and parents alike. As parents most of us love our children deeply and are unaware of what we carry in terms of emotional burdens and its affect on them, even with the best of intentions.

Feelings such as sadness are easily passed through generations via relational bonds. It’s easy to see how a sad mother rears a sad child and down the track a sad grandchild emerges.

This is a family system problem and yet most counsellors and psychotherapists are trained in personal therapies only that perceive clients as isolated beings on the whole. Most approaches are not equipped to look at the relational aspects of the human condition unless they are relationship or family therapies. Because of this many therapists feel the need to do further training in relationships or family therapies to spread their portfolio of offerings to clients.. Unfortunately each style of therapy is separate and often cones from a different philosophy and uses different terminologies which can be confusing for the client.

Hence we have a psychotherapy culture that is striated, resulting in therapists either doing endless training in different modalities to manage a range of client issues or sending their clients to specialists in specific areas..

While psychotherapy outcomes may indeed include encouraging personal responsibility and autonomy for their clients, in discovering who they are and how they perceive the world, the affects of family of origin bonding are often not addressed and remain unresolved.

If how we feel about ourselves is due to our early bonding or family patterns, this is not a purely personal problem and is likely to be unresolved if treated with individual psychotherapy when the family system is the fundamental issue.

Seeing many psychotherapy clients over 17 years I have noticed that individual approaches are unhelpful for deeper issues and particularly for those that have their roots in the family system.

My discovery of Family Constellations was a revelation in showing me another way to assist people in finding a better place with their family of origin and hence a better place within which results in higher self-esteem. More importantly the Family Constellation process is experiential and brief rather than lasting for months or years.

I have trained in many psychotherapy approaches including hypnotherapy and NLP and find value in each of them. However for those people who have spent their lives receiving psychotherapy or personal development who have not found a solution to their issue of (for example) poor self esteem, dealing with it in the context of the family system with the modality Family Constellations is often a powerful solution.

I look forward to a time where Family Constellations is as popular here as in Germany, Spain and South America where groups and private sessions take place in many suburbs and is embraced by the community; parents, children and grandparents alike as a practical solution to life issues.

I see a world where a more unified approach to counselling and psychotherapy is common place so as to work with both the personal and the family system issues that we carry in a unified and wholistic way.

I am excited to have developed the modality Rapid Core Healing which is presented in my book to be launched on 26 May in Brisbane Australia. The modality is presented with case studies and transcripts showing how it may be used by ‘people who help people’ in a seamless wholistic way for the benefit of all.

Free Offer
Receive a chapter from Rapid Core Healing Free by contacting me on yildiz@yildizsethi.com

Book Launch 26 May 2017 Brisbane Qld  contact 0412 172 300 for details
www.rapidcorehealingbook.com.au

Yildiz is the founder of two psychotherapies, a psychotherapist, clinical hypnotherapist, Family Constellations facilitator and educator/trainer and author of three books. Her latest book Rapid Core Healing Pathways to growth and emotional healing (2016). Yildiz lives and runs a private practice in Brisbane, Australia, travelling nationally and globally to train clinicians and run workshops for the general public.

Organisations involved in training or growth interested in training courses of Family Constellations, Rapid Core healing or Emotional Mind Integration courses or applications may contact me on yildiz@yildizsethi.com

These ideas are presented in her book Rapid Core Healing for Growth and Emotional Healing (2016)

Contact yildiz@yildizsethi.com   +61412 172 300

Here is who I am www.yildizsethi.com and this is how you may engage in what I have to offer www.rapidcorehealing.com.

More issues

 

 

 

Rapid Core healing Book Free offer

http://www.rapidcorehealingbook.com/blog/

Family Constellations couples help

Over many years I have seen many couples through my work. They are all unique, however there are some themes.

All relationships go through highs and lows and those that remain loving and strong develop ways of maintaining respect,  fun and resilience.

Janet and John have two young children.
Janet is the eldest of her siblings. Her mother became disabled and so she took on a parenting role for the family. In adulthood she married John who came from a family who experienced a series of challenges. He was a middle child who was often over looked in his family. He had low confidence.

Initially the relationship went well but when they came to see me 10 tears later Janet was exhausted, angry and depressed. John was frustrated and confused. Their sex life was almost non existent.
In looking at their relationship through a constellation it was clear that Janet was wearing the pants in the family. In the relationship she had the better job and was doing well in her career while John was struggling in his work.

Janet constellation helped her find a place as a child of her parents and to give up her role of over giving to others.

John’s constellation assisted him in finding his place as the middle child and connecting with his parents in a way that the hadn’t done in his childhood.He was able to connect with their love. He was connected to the his male ancestry to raise his self esteem.

In the couple constellation Janet was invited to allow John to take his role in the family. Janet found this difficult as she had been used to taking this role although taking this main role as well as staying on top of her career and looking after the children had resulted in a great deal of resentment and anger towards John. The constellation had invited John to step up in his role in the relationship.This releases janet but also challenged her to step back in allowing him to take his role. This is both liberating and challenging for each of he couple.

This formed the basis of changing the dynamics between them so they could recreate a more equal and resilient.

This is just one of many possible dynamics of relationships.

Constellations are appropriate for those who cannot find partner or those who keep attracting unsuitable partners.

More issues

Couples Dynamics 1

Over many years I have seen many couples through my work. They are all unique, however there are some themes.

All relationships go through highs and lows and those that remain loving and strong develop ways of maintaining respect,  fun and resilience.

Janet and John have two young children.
Janet is the eldest of her siblings. Her mother became disabled and so she took on a parenting role for the family. In adulthood she married John who came from a family who experienced a series of challenges. He was a middle child who was often over looked in his family. He had low confidence.

Initially the relationship went well but when they came to see me 10 tears later Janet was exhausted, angry and depressed. John was frustrated and confused. Their sex life was almost non existent.
In looking at their relationship through a constellation it was clear that Janet was wearing the pants in the family. In the relationship she had the better job and was doing well in her career while John was struggling in his work.

Janet constellation helped her find a place as a child of her parents and to give up her role of over giving to others.

John’s constellation assisted him in finding his place as the middle child and connecting with his parents in a way that the hadn’t done in his childhood.He was able to connect with their love. He was connected to the his male ancestry to raise his self esteem.

In the couple constellation Janet was invited to allow John to take his role in the family. Janet found this difficult as she had been used to taking this role although taking this main role as well as staying on top of her career and looking after the children had resulted in a great deal of resentment and anger towards John. The constellation had invited John to step up in his role in the relationship.This releases janet but also challenged her to step back in allowing him to take his role. This is both liberating and challenging for each of he couple.

This formed the basis of changing the dynamics between them so they could recreate a more equal and resilient.

This is just one of many possible dynamics of relationships.

Constellations are appropriate for those who cannot find partner or those who keep attracting unsuitable partners.

More issues

Don’t be a Mini-psychologist, be a great counsellor Yildiz Sethi

Find a point of difference

Family Constellations

It’s time for clinical professional counsellors, psychotherapists and hypnotherapists to stand up to be counted as professionals in our own right. I am a proud counsellor and hypnotherapist. I am proud of the tradition of counselling and its role in helping and healing. I have long been frustrated at the lack of recognition for our great profession. And worse now, is the trend toward mental health training and become something other than what we are.

Yes, the lack of Medicare rebate is an issue for us. But I see a deeper problem. How can we ask the medical system to give us legitimacy, when we haven’t given it to ourselves?

The time has come to better understand how to stand in the great gifts and uniqueness of our profession. Something that will be lost in trying to look like everyone else.

We are no longer a profession with a low level of education. Many have degrees, masters and PhDs, yet we remain excluded from the medical model (psychologists, doctors and psychiatrists) and unable to offer Medicare rebates. The medical model deals with mental health issues diagnosed by the diagnostic book DSM5 along with medication.

How long do we remain respectfully knocking at the door?

In a desperate attempt to gain credibility there has been a move by counselling associations ACA (Australian Counselling Association) and PACFA (Psychotherapists and Counselling Federation of Australia) to encourage members into mental health training.

I am concerned this is an attempt to transform counsellors and psychotherapists into ‘pseudo psychologists’ through adopting psychological terminology, methodology and diagnostics.

This is worrying.

In following this path, counsellors who adopt the medical model approach, put aside their valuable counselling and psychotherapy theory and practice. But no matter how much we mimic psychologists; we remain excluded from the Medicare rebate scheme. We become ‘mini psychologists’ with no real credibility and even worse, lose the valuable knowledge we have as alternative practitioners in the field.

Rather than mimic, let’s find a better way to be of service as professionals. It’s time for us to change our profile and position ourselves in offering services that are unique and of value to the public.

The medical model we are being urged towards consists of CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) in conjunction with medication to control symptoms. It’s important to understand a bit of its history and question its legitimacy.

CBT dates back to the 1960s. It was hailed as revolutionary compared to earlier Freudian and psychodynamic approaches. Freudian therapy was expensive and popular with the wealthy. In comparison, CBT was lauded as the scientific evidence-based approach and as such, appropriate for the public.

However, recent critiques of psychology research shows it mostly takes place in a closed, prescribed and preordained manner, rather than the open enquiry of true scientific process.

CBT is often the only approach researched whatsoever. It’s surprising that other legitimate modalities are typically excluded. I don’t see an honest attempt to source current ‘best practice.’ And this occurs in an environment where the co-dependent cohorts of CBT and the pharmaceutical industry remain intact as the foundations of the medical model.

Many effective approaches – in alignment with current discoveries in neuroscience – are going unnoticed and un-researched. Why is this? Because they are not CBT?

While we in the counselling profession have been stuck in our dilemma of exclusion, the coaching and personal development industry have stepped in. People who don’t wish to be aligned with the medical model or viewed as ‘sick’ now consult with a coach rather than approach the now-stigmatized counselling profession. See The Big Taboo. Link https://www.linkedin.com/post/edit/big-taboo-yildiz-sethi

We do not have to accept being stuck in the same time-warp as the medical model.

We are free to move on if we change our mind-set. Exert our professionalism and our points of difference.

Let’s be creative and embrace innovation and high quality professional development to improve and fine-tune what we offer to our clients in being effective. There have been considerable advancements in psychotherapy philosophy and practice as a result of neuroscience and epigenetics research. Let’s come out from below the radar of the mental health model and bring these discoveries with us.

I took on the challenge of innovating in the fertile climate of evolving science and my own evidence, to become the most effective practitioner I could be. I’m imagining a world where every counsellor does this in their own way, and that we learn from one another too.

I was able to create two psychotherapy modalities, which fuse the best of the past and present in psychotherapy, neuroscience, epigenetics and trance work.

I present this in my latest book Rapid Core Healing Pathways to Growth and Emotional Healing. (2016) In this I present the new modality RCH (Rapid Core Healing) that includes Family Constellations and EMI (Emotional Mind Integration) in a unified wholistic approach.

It is rapid, locating core issues and providing naturally occurring healing pathways to recovery. It is a body-sensed based approach dealing with the mind, body and spirit in a revolutionary way that transformed the way I work as a therapist. I am able to offer short-term results for most in 3-5 sessions for a wide range of issues. This includes anxiety, depression, panic attacks, self-esteem, and inner conflict, relationships, sexual abuse and trauma related issues.

I have no problem telling potential clients if they ask, I am not a psychologist and don’t offer Medicare rebates. I swiftly follow this with my experience of the benefits of the approaches I offer, and there are many. In short I emphasize my point of difference. There is no point in attempting to compete with psychologists.

I am grateful I didn’t become a psychologist, as this would have constricted me in an outdated medical model. I celebrate my freedom to stay up-to-date with latest developments in the field and create more effective ways of working.

There is a place between the medical model and personal development that counselling and psychotherapy can legitimately occupy. We work effectively with depression, anxiety, lifestyle, wellbeing and relationship issues. If we gain the skills and knowledge to work most effectively with our clients and have the courage to develop the healthy pride required to take our place, we will create an alternate and exciting future for our profession.

Stop apologizing for not being a psychologist able to offer Medicare rebates. Do charge appropriately for your education, experience, knowledge and effectiveness in facilitating positive change.

I call on you to find your point of difference. Embrace it, glorify it, and enjoy the freedom it offers. Give yourself permission to stand tall, grow and expand your knowledge and have a thriving practice. Find what works and become really effective at what you offer. Find your niche and hone it.

I have a vision of the professions of counselling, psychotherapy and hypnotherapy taking their place between the medical model and personal development. We’d offer highly effective services to the public, free of stigma and full of hope, consisting of speedy effective pathways to recovery. These ideas are presented in my book Rapid Core Healing for Growth and Emotional Healing (2016).

Lets start a discussion on this subject.

Yildiz is a proud counsellor/psychotherapist: the founder of two psychotherapies, a clinical hypnotherapist, Family Constellations facilitator and educator/trainer and author of three books. Her latest book Rapid Core Healing Pathways to growth and emotional healing (2016). Yildiz lives and runs a private practice in Brisbane, Australia, travelling nationally and globally to train clinicians and run workshops for the general public.

Organizations involved in training or growth interested in courses or applications may contact her.

Contact yildiz@yildizsethi.com

0412 172 300

Here is who I am www.yildizsethi.com and this is how you may engage in what I have to offer www.rapidcorehealing.com.

 

 

 

PR Is it possible to Clear your genetic imprint for yourself AND your children?

PR 8 March 1917

“The personal development industry has blown out over recent years. It provides a range of forums to raise awareness and growth and offers pathways to wellness and success. These appeal to men and women who are focused on fulfilling their potential” said personal development specialist.

 

Yildiz said, “The latest developments in epigentics show that we are influenced by what we inherit and in turn have an effect on future generations.”

 

“There is no doubt parent-child relationships are fundamental in influencing our development. They contribute to how we feel, who we become and how we interact with others.

 

“They affect how we present ourselves in the world. It is here our wounding may be perpetuated through generations.”

 

“Many of us vow to do a better job than our parents but go overboard in our zeal to over compensate and create unintentional effects. This is also problematic.”

 

“There is no such thing as perfect and the middle ground of ‘good enough’ is plenty, as this has more balance and leaves room for growth.”

 

“The dynamics from family influences become the ‘blue print’ from which we operate in all areas of life.”

 

“However, when ‘disordered’ they entangle and restrict us. This often feels like a weight and may be experienced as emotional or psychological burdens, blocks or sabotage. When in ‘Good Order’ they support us”

 

“In modern societies many of us think of ourselves as individuals that are self determining entities. In reality this is not totally honest, as we don’t have the whole picture.”

 

“We are individuals, yes, but also the product of all that has gone before us in our family systems. “

 

“In our family systems we receive love and nurturing. But we also receive unresolved, disturbed senses coming from our connections with our forefathers and mothers. These are unconscious for the most part and may be considered as systemic blocks.”

 

“Such patterns can’t be resolved by affirmations, attempting to change behaviour, willpower or positive thinking alone. This is why coaching, personal development or counselling are insufficient to deal with them effectively. “

 

“Instead a systemic process is better equipped to deal with such patterns. The process of Family Constellations is effective at resolving systemic blocks. “

 

“Systemic Constellations is a process that resolves the underlying dynamics that holds us back.”

 

“The Constellation process originates in Germany and is becoming recognised world-wide as an effective way of resolving systemic blocks,. This often requires one session and may take place in a group process or private session.”

.

“Through systemic resolutions it is possible to re-sett the ‘blue print’ of how we operate in life. A new inner world is formed from which new possibilities may arise.”

 

“From an epigentic perspective this provides the opportunity to heal personal wounds for yourself and pass on a clearer genetic ‘blue-print’ to your children.”

 

Yildiz presents these ideas in her book Rapid Core Healing Pathways ot growth and Emotional Healing (2016) Available from Amazon or www.rapidcorehealingbook.com

 

Ends

 

Yildiz Sethi has been running Family Constellations workshops and private sessions since 2005 and offers training. For more information see www.familyconstellations.com.au

 

Yildiz is the founder of two psychotherapies, a clinical hypnotherapist, Family Constellations facilitator and educator/trainer and author of three books. Her latest book Rapid Core Healing Pathways to growth and emotional healing (2016). Yildiz lives and runs a private practice in Brisbane, Australia, travelling nationally and globally to train clinicians and run workshops for the general public.

 

Organisations involved in training or growth interested in courses or applications may contact me on yildiz@yildizsethi.com

 

Contact yildiz@yildizsethi.com

 

0412 172 300

 

Here is who I am www.yildizsethi.com and this is how you may engage in what I have to offer www.rapidcorehealing.com.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Is it possible to Clear your genetic imprint for yourself AND your children?

The personal development industry has blown out over recent years. It provides a range of forums to raise awareness and growth and offers pathways to wellness and success. These appeal to men and women who are focused on fulfilling their potential.

The latest developments in epigentics show that we are both influenced by what we inherit and in turn have an effect on future generations.

If this is so, how can we clear our imprint for ourselves in a way that is beneficial not only for ourselves but also our children?

We are all born through complex family systems and often into imperfect situations.

If our parents were confused, needy or damaged we are likely to harbour dysfunction and woundings from our upbringing.

There is no doubt parent-child relationships are fundamental in influencing our development. They contribute to how we feel, who we become and how we interact with others. In particular with loved ones. Partners, lovers and children. They affect how we present ourselves in the world. It is here our wounding may be perpetuated through generations.

I offer a scenario of how this takes place.

Bob came home from a war with the trauma of violence, guilt and loss. He had witnessed and been a perpetrator of violence. This greatly affected him and how he related to those around him, in particular, his wife and son Peter. On his return he was unrecognisable as the easy loving man they remembered.

Peter experienced a distant, violent and drunken father. This had an impact on him as experiences of disappointment, disconnection and trauma became part of his daily life. Further he had unresolved grief over the loss of a father he’d loved.

This was a powerful influence on his development.

In adulthood Peter attempted to create the kind of loving environment he’d wanted for himself, for the lives of his children. However, his wounding was still alive and regardless of his efforts to overcome it, he couldn’t be the balanced loving parent he so wished to be.

In truth Peter’s children may have experienced him as moody or ‘absent’ much like his own father, or overly anxious in his efforts to compensate for what he didn’t get for himself.

Both may be problematic.

The children may fail to see the source of their father’s wounding in that he’s has had a more fortunate life than his tragic war-torn father. They may not be aware of the invisible wounding still alive in him.

Of course children just want a happy, balanced and loving father, and parents mostly do the best they can with what they have and what they know. And so it continues.

Here we see how dysfunction may be generated and maintained.

There is no doubt many of us (including me) vowed to be very different to our parents in an attempt to provide a better experience for our children. However in our zeal, we may swing to the opposite and create other unintentional affects. This is because swinging from one extreme to the other is still off-balance and often problematic.

As a young mother with my own wounding and confusion I endeavoured to be a very different parent. In this I went overboard in attempting to give my children everything. Too much and accompanied with an anxiety to be perfect.

This was unrealistic and it had an affect.

I now know that there is no such thing as perfect and the middle ground of ‘good enough’ is plenty, as this is more balanced and leaves room for growth.

In truth giving too much can be equally as damaging as giving too little. Too much may rob our children of the value of self-esteem and resilience. These are qualities gained from finding their own way in the world.

The dynamics from family influences become the ‘blue print’ from which we operate in all areas of life. When they are in ‘good order’ they nurture us.

However, when ‘disordered’ they entangle and restrict us. This often feels like a weight and may be experienced as emotional or psychological burdens, blocks or self-sabotage.

These stop us from being complete.

In modern societies many of us think of ourselves as individuals that are self determining entities. In reality this is not totally honest, as we don’t have the whole picture. .

We are individuals, yes, but also the product of all that has gone before us in our family systems.

In our family systems we receive love and nurturing. But we also receive unresolved, disturbed senses coming from our connections with our forefathers and mothers. These are unconscious for the most part and are may be considered as systemic blocks.

How do you know you have a systemic block?

If you have been aware of a pattern that makes no sense in your biography such as a feeling or a pattern. It may be a systemic block. If you’ve always been aware of self-sabotage behaviour and repeating family patterns, but regardless of trying everything to resolve them, they persist; they are likely to be systemic. Such patterns can’t be resolved by affirmations, changing behaviour, willpower or positive thinking alone. This is why coaching, personal development or counselling are insufficient to deal with them effectively.

Instead a systemic process is better equipped to deal with such presentations. The process of Family Constellations is effective at resolving systemic blocks.

Systemic Constellations is a process that resolves the underlying dynamics that hold us back in a powerful, brief and experiential way. This allows us to come out of entanglements with the past and in a respectful manner for all concerned. This is appropriate for relationship, success and wellness.

The Constellation process originates in Germany and is popular in Spanish speaking cultures. It is becoming recognised world-wide as an effective way of resolving systemic blocks,. This often requires one session and may take place in a group process or private session..

Through resolutions it is possible to resett the ‘blue print’ of how we operate in life. A new inner world is formed from which new possibilities may arise.

In coming to resolve his systemic entanglement, Peter or his children would be able to see and feel where they are stuck. Through the constellation process, they would release the emotional components, find new perspectives and move on in taking any love and support with them into their lives.

From an epigentic perspective this provides the opportunity to heal personal wounds for yourself and pass on a clearer genetic ‘blue-print’ to your children.

I envisage a world where Systemic Constellation theory and practice is common place. So much so it is seen as everyone’s right and privilege to experience as required for resolving systemic blocks. Through this our family dynamics may become clearer in enabling healthier connections. This means more of us in a better connection with our roots, so that love and resources are available to us. This is a fertile place from which each of us has the opportunity to fulfil our potential as unique human beings and enhance our world.

I have been running Family Constellations workshops and private sessions since 2005 and offer training. For more information see www.familyconstellations.com.au

Yildiz is the founder of two psychotherapies, a clinical hypnotherapist, Family Constellations facilitator and educator/trainer and author of three books. Her latest book Rapid Core Healing Pathways to growth and emotional healing (2016). Yildiz lives and runs a private practice in Brisbane, Australia, travelling nationally and globally to train clinicians and run workshops for the general public.

Organisations involved in training or growth interested in courses or applications may contact me on yildiz@yildizsethi.com

These ideas are presented in her book Rapid Core Healing for Growth and Emotional Healing (2016)

Contact yildiz@yildizsethi.com

0412 172 300

Here is who I am www.yildizsethi.com and this is how you may engage in what I have to offer www.rapidcorehealing.com.

See Blog